Tuesday, March 24, 2015

God Hates Gays (And Everyone Else Apparently)

So most of the gay-hating people in the world know the Old Testament Bible verse Leviticus 18:22 which states "Two guys having sex is gross and they are an abomination but two chicks doing it is pretty hot." That may not be the verse line-for-line, but that's how I always interpreted it.

Anywho, I've always pointed out, as do many people with even the slightest grasp of logic and hypocrisy, that if you dig through the Old Testament i.e. the script for history's greatest snuff film, you'll find there's a ton of shit that God finds sinful. I was raised Southern Baptist and was told that a sin is a sin is a sin, meaning no sin is greater than other because they're all an offense to God.

So, growing up with the belief that copying off Donna Jameson's algebra test in the eighth grade is as much a Hell-worthy affront as murdering a hobo, I find it laughable that being gay is worse than some of the other sins listed in the Bible. Especially since being gay isn't a choice, a fact that even most anti-gay "prayer warriors" understand, while getting a haircut, most definitely, is.

And by the way, I still identify as a Christian. I just gave up on organized religion a long time ago because of their very closed-minded view on the Bible and the teachings of Jesus. "Christian" is derived from the word "Christ." You know, Jesus. But instead of living the lessons of Jesus, who taught us to love on another as we love ourselves, too many people want others to suffer, so they point out what everyone else is doing wrong. Basically, they cherry pick the Bible verses that apply to people they don't like without using that accusatory tone against themselves. In lieu of organized religion, I speak directly to the spark of the Lord that is inside me. I find that it works pretty well and there's no middle man required.

I found this in a Facebook comment section. The original post was in regards to a group of "good Christians" picketing a movie that dared depict two homosexuals as loving individuals instead demonic, God-hating pedophiles. I re-post it here in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, one narrow-minded person will read this and think, "Huh. Maybe I need to change my attitudes. Or start protesting the local farmers."

So without further ado, here's something I found pretty awesome. Share it as you see fit.

Dear Dr. Laura,

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for
example, I simply remind him that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to best follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev 1:9). The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an Abomination (Lev 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

g) Lev 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev 19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev 24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.

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