Not Even For 5 Minutes...

(So much for restful sleep, ever. You're welcome.)

You like'a da word sprints, eh? The word sprints, she is a'good, no?

I give you more word sprints.

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“For the love of all that’s good and holy, if you don’t tell your insipid, whatever, friend, to stop talking this very instant, I promise you, what he will awaken to in the morning will make that scene in Godfather look like an outtake from the Care Bears.”

“Jesus, Terry. That’s kinda dark.”

“Why is he still yammering?”

“Jack, shut up. You’re hurting his nib’s feelings.”

Jack, who had been listing, in chronological order, every provable lie Donald Trump had told since announcing his presidency on that iconic escalator ride in June, 2015. He’d been talking more than an hour and had just gotten to August of ’15 when Terry reached his limit.

Terry was an effete gentleman. He was also a dangerous one. His threat to Jack wasn’t baseless; he had used that scene with the bodiless horse as the motivation for several of his pieces. Or contracted revenge murders. Whichever.

He was currently tied to a chair with a rope which, frankly, was really only there for the aesthetic. First, have you ever tried to tie anyone to anything with rope? You can never tighten it tight enough for it to do any difference. If Terry stood up suddenly, he’d be free. Plus, Tony couldn’t tie knots for shit. Second, and probably should’ve led with this, Terry is basically Superman without the moral code. Seriously. Those two idiots are about to fucking die.

The 10 Most Expensive Comics

So there's absolutely no surprise what book is No. 1, but there are some issues down the list that definitely raised my eyebrows. If you've got $10M or so, they can all be yours.

My First Batman

(Photo Credit: DC Wikia)

When I was a lad, there existed a thing called a comic book digest. The most common use of this now (and then for that matter) was Archie Comics. But back in the day, DC Comics would put together five or six issues of random comics, put them in a digest, and sell them cheaply to promote their current titles.

A couple that I remember vividly are a villains origins digest featuring the origins of the Parasite (Superman), Red Dart (Green Arrow), etc. The other, though, was one of my greatest treasures as a child: a Batman digest featuring stories revolving around the five greatest members of his Rogue's Gallery. They were Joker, Penguin, Two-Face, Catwoman, and the Riddler, each story ending with a one-page origin of the villain.

The one story I remember vividly was the Two-Face story and thanks to the internet, I found the issue. It was Batman No. 234, written by Denny O'Neal and pencilled by Neal Adams, two of the faces on my Batman Mt. Rushmore (along with Bill Finger and Bruce Timm, because fuck Bob Kane). A piece of trivia for this issue: it's the Silver Age debut of Two-Face.

Back then, I thought it was gritty and hardcore and now, I'm amazed at how well it has stood the test of time. It's a true testament of just how good the duo of O'Neal/Adams really was.

With the success of the Christopher Nolan Dark Knight trilogy, the upcoming Batman vs. Superman movie, and this being the 75th anniversary of the Caped Crusader, I have found it fun and educational to go back and look at the older issues of Batman and Detective Comics. The first issues of the book hold up reasonably well, while the 50s and 60s are pretty campy. The 70s Batman was where I got my start, so they will always hold a place in my heart and with stories like this one and the legendary Batman No. 251, it's a great example of how quality will truly transcend its time.

LitStack.com: My Top 5(ish) Comic Books

 

So now that I'm back into the swing of things when it comes to writing, I broke out with five (or so) of my all-time favorite comics for LitStack. They include my very first comic (because everyone remembers their first) as well a couple obvious ones and a few that have special meaning to me. Basically, what I'm saying is, this is my list. Not yours. So I don't want to hear your bitching. Make up your own list. Anycrap, you can read the full list by clicking HERE.

Nazis Not Fans of Superman (circa 1940)

(Photo from ComicBookResources.com)

Despite his recent declaration that he is no longer an American citizen but a citizen of the world (not sure if that carried over to the New 52), Superman is right up there with Captain America as a representative of the Red, White & Blue. Prior to American involvement in World War II, Supe's creators worked up a comic showing how the Man of Tomorrow would end the war, which ended up being Superman capturing Adolf Hitler and Joseph Stalin single-handedly and taking them to Geneva to stand trial.

While that bit of history is indisputable, there has been some question over the years as to whether or not the Nazis actually provide an official response. Thanks to our friends at ComicBookResources.com, we know they did. Here's all the saga including the Nazis' anti-semitic comeback.